Exercise: Your Script Rules about Relationships

ExerciseDo you want to know more about what your script is telling you about what’s happening in your relationship? Look for the link below and complete this exercise.

Every couple has their own complex relationship. And that is what makes the balance between the couple sometimes so difficult to maintain.

However, as human nature would have it we are prone to embark again and again on new relationships, still believing and hoping that this time something magical will happen and it will be different.

I have shared many of my experiences with you and I have revealed the reasons for confrontations that happen between both partners. And if we consider each person an independent unit and succeed in analysing his/her concepts of life in detail, we will see the setting of a great number of these concepts and the ideas that come from them back in childhood.

Thus the “grown-up” children, who have bounded their lives with another partner, actually overlays the family environment of their own childhood into their current relationship. That’s why it is important to understand the relationships of our parents, for it is these that become the standard of our own behaviour. Then just multiply this fact by two. Now you have a complete picture and the answer to the equation: two persons coming from two completely different families and joining together into one common relationship has so much to sort out to make this relationship better than their parents’.

In order to do better with the analysis of your own relationship, let me invite you to answer several questions. The basic idea of the questions is to get to know better your partner and yourself. The best way to do this is to do the test yourself first separately from your partner and for them to do it separately from you.  After this compare the answers of both of you and try to find the similarities and differences in your answers.

First and foremost, in order to do the test you need to be bold and honest. Boldness is a must in order for you to be able to dig deep into your own locked subconsciousness, and honesty is the other must to make this exercise a true representation of your relationship.

Another piece of advice I would like to give you is to make every endeavour in finding the tiniest details in your own personal memories. Yes, I do know it sounds easy, but, believe me, it requires concentration and a researcher’s nose. Some memories may be read as insignificant, but may still contain an answer determining your current concepts. So, even if you consider a memory of yours insignificant, try working on it and maybe it will turn out to be the answer to your current relationship’s dilemmas.

My third piece of advice for you will be to be comprehensive in your answers. Help your partner by giving him/her some general directions about filling-in the test and remind him/her that the more detailed the answers the closer the truth about you and him/her.

And finally, at this point you will most probably be surprised by the unique opportunity you are being offered to get to know the person by your side by getting to know his/her memories shared on paper. Now, these memories (except for being only short stories about the past) become a recipe for your own relationship. What is unique about working with the test is that each single answer given only brings you closer to the happiness of being a complete couple.

I will be honoured to hear about your own experience. Please write to me and share your feelings while filling in the test. Did you have any difficulties or did your memory give you 100% of its capacity? And, of course, what were the new things you found out about your partner and your relationship with him/her?

This exercise is from ‘Love, Lies & The Games Couples Play’; a self-help book filled with information and exercises for anyone struggling with or who wants more from their relationship than they are currently getting. For your own personal copy click here.

To the wonder of you,





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