March 19, 2021,
Counselling, Family, Fundamental Human Needs, Life, Love, Relationship, Script 
No comments
So, if Dad got mad when something went wrong, you might get mad and respond in the same way he did. Or, maybe your mother got sad when something went wrong, and depending on your personality and your closeness to each of your parents, you might respond that way instead.
It could be worth noting here that your personality is already there at your birth. This phenomenon subsequently influences how you respond to events in your later life, and it also influences which parent, if any, you are most likely to imitate in your behaviors, thoughts, and feelings when confronted with a particular situation.
The way you choose to respond to circumstances could be the topic for a whole other book, but suffice it to say here that your personality, your gender, the environment you grew up in, and the way you were rewarded (or punished) for what you did as a child all shaped the way you respond to your life to some degree or another, and for good or for bad, as the adult you are now.
How you respond becomes your script, your prescription, for life. Its instructions tell you how to react to what happens in your life as you fulfill each of your roles.
Your script can be positive or negative, depending on how you interpret and act out the instructions.
On the good side, the script includes the instructions for keeping you safe by teaching you how to get along with others. It is all part of the socializing process and the protocols we should follow in living with others. Without these rules, anarchy would prevail. Everybody would only be focused on themselves, without any thought for anyone else or for any of the laws of the land that keep us all as safe as possible.
A positive script is very different from a negative script. If, in those very early years of your life, your five fundamental needs were recognized and met, you will have grown up to be a confident adult, with a healthy, positive script. You can care for yourself and ask for care from others appropriately and know that you will get that care as you need it and as they are able to give it.
If, on the other hand, your fundamental needs were not acknowledged or satisfied in you as a young child, then you run the risk of developing an unhealthy, negative script. You could very well grow up seeking to have those needs satisfied in inappropriate ways, often to your ultimate disadvantage.
In other words, the ways you seek to have your needs met reflect how your parents and/or other significant people in your life modeled those ways for you.
To the wonder of you,
Leave a reply