What I have learned from my many years in a relationship, and as a Relationship Counsellor, Coach and Therapist, is that there are several fundamental human needs that need to be satisfied for someone to have a happy life and … Continued
I would like to say something about the title of my book Love, Lies, and the Games Couples Play. Put simply, love, and all that it embodies for us, is what each of us seeks in life above all else. … Continued
Love – A Never-Ending Story While I ended this story with “She lived happily ever after,” in truth, the “ever after” has not come to be yet. The story is really never ending. Every day offers my partner and me … Continued
A Fairy Tale Once upon a time, there was a young girl who, wide-eyed and full of dreams, left her hometown by the coast and followed her knight in shining armor to the city. Their wedding was a spectacular affair … Continued
Berne, like many others studying human behaviour at the time, suggests that a childlike stance is more likely to occur in a person’s third or fourth decade of life, after the skills to ensure survival have been fully developed. By … Continued
Spontaneity Eric Berne, Founder of Transactional Analysis as a model of therapy, defines spontaneity as the capacity to see multiple options from which we choose to act. We can freely choose how we think, feel, and behave in response to … Continued
In The Games People Play, Eric Berne defined the process of becoming autonomous (self-determining) as the manifestation of the “release or recovery of three capacities: awareness, spontaneity, and intimacy.” Let’s take a closer look at the first of Berne’s three … Continued
I use the acronym TOUCH to remember the five ways of funding my love bank. T is for Time Relationships aren’t part-time arrangements. And, if your relationship is fed on left-over time (the time you have after everything else has … Continued
Theoretically, the more money you invest, the greater the return. And if you’re a patient investor, you can even double or triple the return. Similarly, the unconditional love you give to your partner is a very wise investment. And just … Continued
An Exercise: To discover your conditions for great sex: Get a piece of paper and a pen and set aside half an hour or so. Think back to your best-ever sexual experience or experiences. If you have never had a … Continued