December 30, 2021,
Family, Games People Play, Life, Script 
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You might even think that if only the other person could change or be more like they used to be when you first met, then everything would be OK. On the other hand, you might distract yourself by having an affair, or by doing any number of other things to fill in time and thereby remove yourself from the conflict. Many people use distractions instead of confronting what the conflict may mean for them and what they could learn or change about themselves that could improve the relationship between them and their partners.
Some of the things people do to distract themselves from reviewing their script beliefs and behaviors could include working more hours, spending more time at the gym, eating more, eating less, shopping more, gambling, drinking to excess, reading cheap novels or spending hours on their electronic gadgets just to name a few.
Scripts entwine and exist between all people with all people. This happens first, and most obviously, at the family level, where each member of the family affects each other member through their interactions using their body language, words, and political maneuvering as they gang up on each other.
These family members then socialize, participating in an extended family, a community, and ultimately a nation. Every individual affects a whole world of differing cultures made up of networks of many individuals: Person A affects Person C by affecting Person B, because B regularly interacts with C—say, at work or school, and so on throughout the network, forever.
If you can picture a spider’s web and put a member of your family, extended family, friendship group, work group, community group, and so on, at every junction, you might get more of a sense of how enmeshed you are with each other person in your life. Now imagine that this spider’s web doesn’t just exist on a single plane but is actually three-dimensional. How much more complicated does that now make it?
Here’s an example from my family: maybe I did something wrong when I was young (and there were quite a few of those times, by the way), and my mom wanted me to learn a lesson. She would speak to Dad, who would then talk to me.
This simple series of conversations ultimately affects all of us—my mom, my dad, and myself—as I learn my lessons (or not), and as my mother and father are pulled closer together in their parenting relationship.
What else could have happened is that my mother, speaking with a friend, hears about something the friend did when a similar situation came up with her child. Mom might have brought that suggestion into our family. And so the cycle of life, of parenting, and the fulfillment of my life script continues.
What I have also come to realize in my work is that cultural differences do not just exist across nationalities or religious groups, but across family groups as well. So in reality, even though your neighbors may be the same nationality or religion as you, they may actually have an entirely different set of customs and beliefs and so are culturally very different from you. And while my mother may have gotten some ideas about child rearing from one friend, she may have gotten other ideas from another friend. The culture of my family then expands further and further into the community it exists in.
To the wonder of you,
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