human needs tagged posts

September 1, 2015,  Family, Games People Play, Relationship, Relationship Tips  No comments

Do you know this feeling? You are angry. You want to throw yourself at your partner both physically and verbally. You want to show them how much they are wrong and how right you are with all your strength.

There is no need to answer me because everyone who has contemplated fighting fair knows what I am talking about. If we behave that way there will be no relationship left. Right?

We will be like some primitive people who cannot converse but also have never heard of communication, conversation and rules. I will share with you what I do in such situations and in this way I will present to you:

Relationship Rules for Effective Communication

First, when I feel stressed, I take whatever time I need to compose myself while looking for the most effective way to share what I want to say with the...

August 6, 2015,  Family, Relationship  No comments

Do you remember the movie “Mr. and Mrs. Smith”? It was a battle of characters, personalities and one upmanship. Do you remember Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt in this amazing battle of wills filled with lies, deception, lots of bullets and fast cars, and the scent of a roasted meat, red wine and a few candles?

At some moments the couple were very pleasant to each other while at others they were vicious. Does the theme of this movie sound familiar? Is this a theme that is evident in your relationships? If so read on as I address how to deal with these conflicts.

By the way it is so important that you do deal with these conflicts and the sooner the better.

Why? Simply because if you don’t they can damage you and your relationship and leave a lasting scar that may never be fully recovera...

June 18, 2015,  Family, Relationship  No comments

What do we really know about the power of two people who become a couple? Can we describe it with words, numbers or a vision? If for me the power of a strong relationship is expressed through my own experience and work with dozens of families, then for others it might even be expressed in the power of the family integrity expressed through much more than a life time next to one another.

I will share with you a story that moved both me and thousands of people around the world. This is a story about the power of the human spirit separately and as a part of a couple like a quadratic equation that gives the answer to the question that is Step 5 of the development of interpersonal relationships.

An inspiring example of a powerful couple

A story that keeps coming up in my local community is tha...

June 10, 2015,  Events  No comments

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If you would like to attend the free presentation please ring 02 99978518 or email admin@northernbeachescounselling.com.au with the words: “Yes I would like to attend the free presentation”.

Some excerpts from my workshops.

April 8, 2015,  Relationship  No comments

You wake up one morning only to find out that you are lying in your own bed with a complete stranger next to you. And then you ask yourself how to find the differences in this picture – from yesterday and today. Is it some kind of joke? You might be able to guess that I’m describing the “waking up” after the blissful sleep that was the honeymoon.

And even if the first stage lasted for a whole calendar year, waking up is simply an inevitable end to a time of precious sleep. Alas, even the strongest coffee cannot sober you up after you’ve made that jump into the new reality.

Let me share with you – the same happens with all couples all around the world, always and without a miss. Accept this new step as the time when we need to accept the statement:

Differences deserve to be rec...

March 25, 2015,  Events  No comments

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Relationship Recovery – Have You Recently Separated or Divorced?

If you would like to attend the free seminar please ring 02 99978518 or email admin@northernbeachescounselling.com.au with the words: “Yes I would like to attend the free seminar”.

Some excerpts from my workshops.

March 20, 2015,  Relationship  No comments

They were talking while having a glass of wine as they often did. Four women talking about their relationships until one of them shared: “…We’ve been together for six months now. But I can’t breathe anymore! He just wants to be attached to me all the time. Even when I’m working, he wants to cuddle up just like a baby … Why is that so many men do that to me…? I am not his mother! It was nice for a time. I thought he just really loved me… but I need my own space back!”

It is easy for us to guess that this woman, who has just taken off her rose coloured glasses, is now seeing her partner for real out of the context of the honeymoon stage of their relationship...

February 25, 2015,  Relationship, Relationship Tips  No comments

I met a client yesterday who told me that for no apparent reason or cause her partner came to her one day and told her he wasn’t happy. He said he wanted to take six months living separately from her to decide whether he really wanted to be in this relationship. She was dumbfounded and asked whether he was seeing someone else. He denied it. He just kept saying he wasn’t happy and needed some time separate.

Couples often do not realize the problems that prevent them from being happy. Instead, they keep searching for the answers outside of themselves and outside of their relationships rather than looking within.

Furthermore, there are many cases when following a break-up, one of the couple jumps into a new relationship before taking the time to explore their part in the breakup...

February 24, 2015,  Events  No comments

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Is Your Relationship In Trouble?

January 28, 2015,  Games People Play, Relationship, Script  No comments

How each of the Game Positions Plays Out I Am Not OK and You Are Not OK

Every year the Academy presents the Award for Best Motion Picture – Drama or Serial distinguished by exclusive audience interest. In real life, however, there is no Academy to present us with awards for the roles we play. But we make every endeavour to fight for that Oscar, creating inappropriate relationships, where we often find ourselves telling our partner: “I Am Not OK”. People love the drama genre, and that is not only in movies, books, and serials, but in their own personal life as well.

Here are the three main characters and their view of life in their real life movies.

The Aggressor: I Am Not OK

Aggressors are not OK, and for them, no one else can be OK either...